Out-dreamt myself

    I was God, or maybe Jesus. I was chatting with Moses. I had skipped school that day because a) I had important divine business to take care of (it was specified in the dream but I forget) and b) I hadn't done my homework. I was razzing Moses about him being 4,000 years old, and how he would phrase that in a personal ad. ("Just starting my 5th millennium...") My homework was something to do with him, too, but I can't remember what that was, either. Oh, and I was living in a supermarket. For once it was a wholly imaginary one, rather than the Colonial Store that used to be next to the KMart on Fort Jackson Blvd and which figures so prominently in my dreams most of the time.
    Generally, I find that these totally bizarro dreams mean that I need to use the bathroom, and that certainly was the case. But boffo, that was a pretty weird one. Maybe I ought to ease back on the curry buffets.

Catchphrase purge

    I have, and have always had, an unfortunate tendency towards the catchphrase. Alice always claimed that my NPR program would be called "Be That As It May, with John Dantzler," though I honestly don't remember ever saying that particular one. (I will admit that it sounds like something I would say, though.) In recent years, it has been, "On the short list of really good ideas ISN'T found..." whatever is irritating me at that particular moment, tailgating, say. And I fully understand that it's a silly phrase to latch onto, too cumbersome, too circumlocutious (if that's a word). In other words, on the short list of really good ideas ISN'T found... saying "On the short list of good ideas ISN'T found..."
    This is what comes from spending all your time talking to a kitty. She isn't very discriminating, so long as whatever you say is punctuated with scritches.

Everything's $3

    At Rosewood Market, I bought kale and rice noodles, each of which was $2.99. So I said to the teller, "It's a beautiful day today at Everything's $3!" Which drew a smile, fortunately. (I would call her older, since she has white hair, but she's probably younger than me. That happens a lot lately.)
    I'm a bit weatherish and should probably not risk infecting my dad, but Margaret wants to visit and I'm her ride. So I'm hitting the Listerine hard and making chicken noodle soup (what the rice noodles were for) and planning to hold my breath a lot. Or, I dunno, go to the big and tall shop and try to find him some warmer clothes for the colder weather. It happens to be conveniently located. Kismet, I'm thinking.

Incorrecting

    A few weeks ago at Drinking Liberally, a young woman mentioned the pe-CAHNS in my portable baklava and I reflexively said "pee-cans." I made a joke of it and certainly wasn't seriously disagreeing with her pronunciation, but on some fundamental level, I probably was. Your accent gets so ingrained that it becomes a part of you. Also, I always felt that the wood should be pronounced one way and the nut another. (Not that this approach requires either to be pronounced "pee can." Pi-CAHN and pi-CANN, respectively, probably meet the situation well enough.)
    This Tuesday at DL, I had to correct (apologetically, even embarrassedly), or rather incorrect a young man regarding the local pronunciation of a nearby road, settlement and lake called Monticello. We pronounce it MontiSELLo. Mortifyin'.
    The Southernese pronunciation that I've never quite believed is "bedroom suit." No one has ever said it to me directly, but they say it in local TV furniture store ads (or did when I watched TV). I always picture my imaginary incorrecter saying, "No, (pronounced, unspellably, somewhere between "Naw" and "Now," like Andy Griffith did in "No Time for Sergeants") it isn't 'bedroom SWEET.' It's bedroom SUIT. You ain't from around here, are ya?"

Free free free

    I still fantasize about opening a store featuring only gluten-free casein-free soy-free foods. In my fantasy, the name would be No! No! No! because I think it's funny. But I have to admit that Free Free Free would probably bring in more customers. Only problem with that is of course that people might think that I'm giving everything away. I appreciate that it's a pain in the butt leaving comments on Blogger, but I'm pretty sure that using the Reaction tool doesn't require giving up any information or any other pain or agony. If you'll vote "Funny" for No! No! No! or "Zippy" for Free Free Free. Or comment. Or, you know, email me. I'd be grateful, but if nobody does, you need not worry about it. This is still totally hypothetical, after all.

It'll be easy

    Sure. All we have to do is talk Dad into spending money on himself. At the previous nursing home, (sister) Anne had to deposit $40 into an account so that he could get a haircut. The haircut cost $12 so there was a balance due. Anne didn't care about it but Dad was fairly adamant that we get that money back. (It was no problem.) But the point is that free spending isn't in his makeup.
    If we can get Dad moved to assisted living, Medicare B will pay for any therapy he needs, but he'll have to cover room and board. This will mean something like hundreds a day, thousands a week. I'm not sure he'll be willing, but he certainly knows that he needs to be stronger. Hopefully, he'll see the light and do the math; it's not like he can't afford it.
    Also, as I think I've said already, he and Margaret really need to move to some place built for people their age, i.e. with railings on all walls and fittings and convenient to health care personnel. Talking them into that'll likely be double the challenge!

Peeled

    It is no news flash that English has a number of dialects. but I at least am always surprised when I have to learn a new one. As a person who used to date a daughter of a shrimping family, I would have thought I had shrimpese down, but no. At the fish market, I always asked for "shelled" shrimp, and got mad when they brought me shrimp with shells on. As it turns out, at least in Columbia, what I needed to ask for was "peeled" shrimp. Did so yesterday with happy results. And the shrimp boil turned out awesome, even when I forgot to put the garlic in. Huzzah!