Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Grumpiness insurance

    I got nothing at the moment, but in less than an hour I have to take Dad to the gastroenterologist again. This is the same outfit that thinks nothing of making you wait four hours before you see the actual doctor. The last couple of times, they have been better, so hopefully this won't be so bad either. All I'm saying is that if I wait to write my blog until I actually have something to write about, that something likely would be unnecessarily whiny and unpleasant.
    Also, while I was as always bewildered by my dreams, I can't actually remember them. It IS your lucky day! All I noticed after the fact was that they seemed to be spinning off from the old-time radio murder mysteries that were playing without actually being related to them. This was cool; cooler still was that they weren't scary, horrifying or murder-centered. So hey, a pleasant night. Who'd-a figured?

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Brake light light

    At various times over the past few months and almost constantly over the last week, the indicator light saying that there is a problem with the brake lights on my car has been alit. I don't want to brag about how few friends I have, but I really don't have anyone to check whether in fact I have a problem with the brake lights. The fact that the light goes on and off though suggests that it's more likely some major or minor electrical problem somewhere along the line. I mean, once your brake light goes out, normally it stays out, so presumably an accurate indicator would just stay lit all the time.
    Yesterday I went for an oil change. Parenthetically (See? Parentheses!), I went to the location across town from the one I usually go to. The guy at the usual location just wears me out trying to sell me overpriced work that he doesn't describe clearly or well. (This is the guy who told me the CV joint would get up in the transmission.) The guy at the other location tried to sell me a different load of work, not in any way mentioning any of the absolutely essential work that the other guy had been pushing three months ago. I can only infer that they go from the mileage and the preventative maintenance schedule. (Even paranthetically-er, I recently gave serious thought to switching to a mechanic just because the sign out front said "preventative" instead of "preventive." Pathetic, right?)
    Yesterday was of course the day that the brake light light decided to stop shining, so I didn't have any cause to ask the oil change guy if the brake light was working. Even though we don't have state inspections anymore, I like to think he checked it anyway, and I certainly should have asked. If damn thing stays on much longer, I'll just get new brake light bulbs and see if that makes it go away. I'll need them eventually anyway, right?
    (All paragraphs must now end with "right?")

Monday, April 21, 2014

But shouldn't that be Lilies for Guns?

    For Easter, a local church had a Guns for Lilies exchange yesterday. It may have been more than one church; I heard on the radio that the local police had had a gun exchange this weekend. Either way, I'm not just being flippant when I ask if it would be better to call it Lilies for Guns. The other way sounds like you bring your lily and get a gun. Doesn't it? Of course, maybe that's how it works; I wasn't present for the exchange.
    Whatever they call it, it sounds like a fine idea and I hope it was very successful. I mean if they were exchanging lilies for guns instead of the other way around, that is.

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Winning the Boy I'm Dumb Decathlon

    For years now I've been steaming my vegetables like it's a religion. I mean all the 5-odd years I've been living here, and maybe during the Alice era before that. And almost that entire time, I've been using (and using up) 11-inch nonstick skillets along with the slightly smaller lid from my big spaghetti pot. This has never worked, but yet I keep doing it. I have no idea at all why I never just used the spaghetti pot instead. It should have been only common sense; for one thing, the lid fits! I can only guess that I tried it once long ago and found it tricky to get the steamer insert out of the deeper pot. Anyway, that's the only idea that makes sense (besides the "I'm a moron" one, but I don't like that one).
    Yesterday, in another Aha! moment, I tried it again. It was no problem at all; just a matter of allowing a few minutes for the steaming water to stop steaming, then draining it off so if the stuff falls out of the insert it doesn't wind up all sopping. My grasp of the completely obvious: improving all the time!

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Woke up working on a joke

    Not much of a joke, I'll admit, but I still thought it was kind of cool to wake up with an attempted witticism on my mind. No doubt I've made assaults on the same joke-mountain before, since I'm partial to aphorisms, but it is a cruel goddess. The aphorism in question is "Time and tide wait for no man." Since Newsweek went out of print last year (or so; probably it's been five years now, the years fly by so fast), there would be a fine joke in it if only there was a laundry soap brand that had gone away about the same time. But no!
    About the best I can do is Duz. Speaking of time flying, it went away around 1980. So not really a joke that will make sense to a lot of people. I still like it (Time and tide wait for no man, but Newsweek and Duz are probably thinking about it) but I can't see anyone else getting much of a kick out of it.
    Also also, what it laundry detergent (or dishwashing detergent) a(n) euphemism (or euphemisms) for? I eventually settled on laundry (or dish) soap, as you can see, but it seems like there ought to be something else that I just can't think of. Just soap, I guess. I seem to recall that old-time radio ads pushed Lux Flakes for laundry, dishes, face cleaning and every other use. So I guess it isn't so much a euphemism as an aid to training the consumer to buy more unnecessary things. Something else to ponder in my sleep, I guess.

Friday, April 18, 2014

Hey, a killer app!

    I finally found out what smart phones are for for those of us not interested in Angry Birds. I'm more than a little embarrassed that it took this long for me to figure this out, particularly as I have over the years noted an increased need to use grocery lists. For some reason that I don't think is vanity I hardly ever use them, though, and thus wind up making a lot of unnecessary return trips to grocery stores.
    And then I thought, I bet there's an app for that! Oddly, though there are many many apps for that, most of them are overloaded with bells, whistles and geejaws. I don't really need my groceries sorted into categories; I don't really need prices. So I wound up uninstalling the grocery list apps immediately and getting a plain checklist app. It's awesome! I just had to enter everything I'm ever likely to buy (which netted out to only about 70 items, much to my surprise). Then anything I need, I check the checkbox. Then I can sort by checked items, and there's my list. It's really been great. As a plus, I feel slightly less foolish about carrying my cell with me everywhere, which I do due to worry about Dad-related emergencies. As the emergencies have gotten fewer and fewer, it seems less necessary to carry the cell, but it's still a good idea. So this is an added benefit to having it with me; I never forget my grocery list. So OK, it took forever for me to think of something that should have been glaringly obvious; I got there eventually!

Thursday, April 17, 2014


    It's ironic, I know, to gripe about somebody griping, especially to do so in a blog devoted to three years before the griping mast. So I'm not griping about her griping; I'm griping about having to listen to it when she doesn't have the sense to realize it isn't doing her any good.
    Dialysis is not any fun. It's painful and boring and uncomfortable at best. Also dialysis facilities have a lot of staffing issues, so frequently you have to wait to get your painful, your boring and your uncomfortable on. Also also, most patients have to catch rides with commercial medical transportation services. These have their own rules that are mostly insane and certainly don't have much to do with actually helping their clients.
    So what I'm saying is that the lady had legitimate gripes. Her ride was late so she was late, and then she had to wait an hour or more (she was still waiting when Dad got called) while others (including as I say Dad) went ahead of her. However, sitting and saying loudly a hundred times "This is b---s---!" probably didn't help her cause, nor did grousing that she was going to get transferred to another facility. (I'm saying to myself, "Oh please oh please oh please oh please.")
    The way I complain is politely, politely, politely, politely and then finally angrily when I get to that hour point where she was. But I'm rational and reasonable (well, I have reasons) and never, ever, ever cuss in any way at all. I think the difference between losers and non-losers (I certainly can't call myself a winner, but I seldom lose) is expectations. I stay up there and keep making my argument until somebody gives ground. She wanders away grumbling and continues grumbling and cussing and making herself unpopular in the waiting area. I guess what I'd say to her would be, "Lady, if you're a bigger whinybutt even than I am, maybe you want to rethink your communication strategy." (Yeah, I know, nobody would think it's possible.)