Ring ring telephone ring

    I really need to assign individual ringtones on my phone. Because most calls are calls from my dad and most of those are some form of bad news, I tend to go into fight or flight mode every time the phone rings. Today, it was two calls from the heating and air people about scheduling the winter service for the HVAC system. (That's paid for by the landlord, by the way, so no particular need for fight or flight.) I'm pretty much adrenalin riddled right now, which is ridiculous.
    Other thing I wish about cell phone ring tones at least on the Windows Phone is that there would be some way to lock the volume level. I carry the thing around in my shirt pocket all the time and the volume turns itself down oftener than not. On the other hand, if it hadn't been set at 2/3 the maximum volume a moment ago, I guess I would be even more adrenalin riddled. Then again, if the call hadn't come just as I was going to the bathroom, I suppose I would be considerably less adrenalin riddled. Timing is everything, I suppose.
    To be fair to Windows Phone, no doubt there's a very easy way to lock the ringtone volume that I'm just missing due to my longstanding dedication to maintaining my Luddite status. Nope; checked; they're just idiots. There is a very easy way to toggle between ring + vibrate and vibrate, which I didn't know before and which is very nice. Where's that Microsoft suggestion box?

Edit: I'm pretty sure that the song in question didn't have a telephone in it, confining its rings to two-syllable ones (golden, doorbell, and I don't know what else) but I've earwormed myself with it pretty badly nevertheless. In the hope of not doing the same to the reader, I won't give any further clues to what song I'm talking about. (If it's not already stuck in your head, believe me, you're grateful.)